Moving Back

So my study space at home got pulled out from under me.

This had its benefits, however, and it meant that I was able to move back to my student residency so that I had a calm space to study in. The plan is to go back home on weekends while staying here during the week. Being back here has been an experience.

I no longer have this massive outdoors space within which to walk and picnic. I have countered this seemingly negative situation by doing indoor exercises to keep me fit. I found this workout challenge on Pinterest (yes, I still use Pinterest, sue me) and I must say, it has been working for me so far. I also make my own small indoor picnics by putting a blanket on my floor and enjoying my space. Since I’ve been making my own food as well, I am able to eat my meals whenever I wish. This has been a major plus.

I have been working on self-improvement. I have found myself feeling rather depressed lately (depression is something I tend to struggle with a lot) and so I decided to make changes to my diet and general lifestyle. I think that actually taking the time to workout every morning has also improved my mental state. Being back here has forced me to be healthy because I don’t have as great an access to the nearest store. I count this as a pro because health is something that I need to work on and this is a great opportunity to get going on that front.

Being back at my student residency has been very calming. It is a less chaotic environment than home is. I am actually able to study well in this environment and I fee as though my marks will reflect this. I am so happy to have my study space back and to be able to act out all my weird quirks that help me to study. My work life is thriving here. Here’s to hoping that this continues.

Stay home, folks.

–Birdie

College and the Idea of Loneliness

So, I recently started college and I am simultaneously prepared and unprepared for it.

Everyone understands that college is nothing like high school, that the lecturers don’t give a shit about you and that sex is rampant but for these past few weeks, I have been suffering from something completely out-of-character for me. Persistent loneliness and isolation.

Everyone tells you that you’ll be overwhelmed by the sheer amount of people you meet during college orientation, however, this is nothing like my own personal experience. These past few weeks I have become friends with a grand total of two people. I’m not someone who takes pride in having a shit ton of friends so that’s not what bothers me. What bothers me is the fact that I am in college, surrounded by people and my whole two friends and continue to feel completely isolated. This is something temporary for me and I have a pretty strong resolve, take a ton of anxiety and depression meds, and have a gift for butting into people’s conversations but I worry for the people who aren’t like me.

College/university isn’t all partying and socialisation for everone involved. It can be hard to keep in touch with people and to create new acquaintanceships. I feel like people who’ve been to college in the past tell everyone to worry about over-socialising but never mention the potential hazards of under-socialising. If isolation is your jam, good on ya! I worry about the people who are affected by loneliness. If I have felt as awful as I have these past few weeks than how would someone feel who is a lot more mentally vulnerable than I am? It just bothers me that someone might be starting college right now and suffering from budding anxiety or depression due to their lack of human connection.

The solution to this issue would be to stop assuming as a society that everyone will have the same/similar experiences as a college freshman. We need to warn people about their potential lack of social life in college so that they can start creating a support system before it’s too late.

I realise that I sound superr Tumblr Ho with all this ~mental health guyzz~ talk, but I do believe that this is an issue that people just don’t discuss enough when it comes to college.

Agree with me or don’t, that’s just how I feel. If you are one of the Gs who actually get what I’m saying please consider telling a future college kid that you may know (if you start lecturing a random high school senior without warning, you might get arrested- don’t be creepy!) about this issue. You could actually help someone.

Well, that’s my emotional rant for the day. If you’re looking for me, I’ll be lost in a downward spiral of Netflix documentaries.

-Birdie

An Intervention for University/College Websites

So, here’s the tea.

There are few inanimate objects that really make me want to kill a bitch. I lie, there are many objects that do this, however, the ones that I will be addressing today are: University/College websites. They suck ass and I don’t mean one of them, I mean ALL of them.

Their issue is not with interface or general aesthetic, they are usually really nice to look at. I am sure that they are simple to navigate for a student who has already been enrolled in the institute before but I am speaking from the perspective of a newcomer. Their issue is the sheer lack of available information as well as their confusing and often contradictory instructions.

Let’s start with the lack of information. As someone who isn’t going into STEM, I have learnt NOTHING. They’ll give you the dictionary definition of your faculty but then you’re on your own, kiddo! The information that I did manage to acquire came from contacting the lecturers themselves and even they took a while to reply (because they are respected individuals with a profession that requires attention even outside of set work hours). When choosing electives not only was I extremely lost but so were my peers! For the life of me I could not find any definitive tips or rules regarding registration. Even now, I can’t even find the list of prescribed textbooks, smh…

When registering I was told to contact a specific individual who then told me to contact a certain department who THEN told me to contact the individual whom I had contacted in the first place. When receiving my timetable for the year I deadass couldn’t read it. I’m not dismissing the possibility that I could just be extremely dumb, however, I like to think that I did the best I could seeing that I was a future freshman armed with no instructions whatsoever. For those wondering if I ever figured out the timetable, I didn’t. A sophomore friend created a friendlier, more organised timetable for me. I’m not a dude but I for sure felt both grateful and emasculated at the same time. Why is a website giving me emotional turmoil, do I seem like a Tumblr chick to you? On second thought, maybe don’t answer that…

Even when applying for college, every website just seemed so complicated. My theory is that they weed out the weak ones by purposefully making their sites a living hell. There was a stage where I had an outstanding contract which I didn’t even know that I had to send the college a physical copy of until months later when one of my fellow peers where discussing their application process and their sibling was already attending the institution! I read things through. As Gina Linetti as I am, when it comes to college applications I go FULL Amy Santiago on those hos. Until very recently I’ve just been floating in a deep abyss of anxiety and confusion and all because of a college website.

What bothers me most about this is that this ain’t an unsolvable problem. If a uni IT guy ever comes across this: WEBSITES SHOULDN’T MAKE YOU STRESSED! None of this is a jab at the universities themselves, I for one totally dig my college, but if you teach web design you should at least have a user-friendly website, ya feel? Work from the perspective of a high school senior…you know, the people you want to attract in the first place. If you feel me, feel free to comment on this post because tbh I feel personally attacked by university websites.

Think of the children!

-Birdie

897a8aafc3b9ff41db13f2b16ea10b0a